Visitations Part II

Some more quick thoughts on my web traffic since my last update:

  • I was mistaken earlier when I said that I had been visited by 49 states with West Virginia the lone holdout. It turns out West Virginia hadn’t visited, that part was true, but neither had Delaware or Rhode Island. West Virginia did visit this week, followed by Delaware, and then finally Rhode Island, so all 50 states have now stopped by. Drinks are on me!
  • I am unpopular with the druids. Exactly zero visits from the towns around Stonehenge. Zero! This may hurt my chances at becoming Archdruid.
  • I am also unpopular in Japan (Finland and China have since clocked in, so Japan is the lone holdout of countries I’ve visited). Perhaps the druids have taken over Japan. I need to look into this.
  • Each country has a two letter identifier at the end of their Internet address, except for the US, which is only fair since Al Gore did invent the Internet. Much like two letter identifiers for the states of the US, however, some of them are not for the countries I expected. For example, did you know that Switzerland is ch, so China is not ch but cn, and Canada is not cn but eh?
  • Canada has visited but at a much lower rate than I expected compared to the US. I had planned to run a targeted campaign by blogging about hockey sticks and Pocky sticks (attracting both Canadians and the druid-Japanese), but I no longer believe it will be enough to attract my friends to the north. What we need is an invasion. Fifty-Four Forty or Fight! Who’s with me? Hello? Anyone? Hello?

3 thoughts on “Visitations Part II

  1. That is, my slogan would be something like Forty-Five* Is All Right! Thank You Kindly!

    *Not wanting to impose my desire for Canadian oversight upon the entire US, as long as Portland is subsumed, I’ll be happy. This may not be the invasion plan you were suggesting.

  2. A good slogan is certainly the most important part of any campaign, although yours is decidedly un-Manifest Destiny-ish and headed in the wrong direction. I don’t want to cross the border just to go to Yellowstone.

    Still, perhaps you’re on the right track with the kindler, gentler approach and my campaign needs to be an advertising campaign and not a military one. After all the White House got torched the last time we invaded, and there are probably even more countries (and blue states) that will come to their aid now than in 1812.

    You can be at the vanguard of my advertising blitz, taking armfuls of kittens across the border wearing sweaters that say “”. We’ll hit Vancouver and Victoria and Edmonton and Montreal and Calgary and Wetaskiwin too, conquering with cuteness (sharp claws deployed only as a last resort).

    I’ll get my wife to knit up a prototype. I’ll also let her put it on Scout, I’m going to stand across the room, or maybe in another room altogether. Or maybe even outside.

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