Finally Some Good News

Our cat Sam sleeps in a bunny rabbit pose on June 21, 2014. Original: _IMG_9052.CR2

After a trying week that followed several trying months, Sam has staged a turnaround. He’s responded well to the medicines he’s been taking (fluids, anti-nausea, appetite stimulant, and motility enhancer to speed the movement of fluid through his digestive system). We started him off on baby food, which he hadn’t eaten much of a couple of days earlier but now he was able to eat, and slowly eased him back to a more normal eating schedule and his regular food. Sam is back to eating his normal meals (just more slowly than before), his energy levels have improved dramatically, and his sweet demeanor seems to be returning to normal as well. Thankfully we didn’t have to resort to force feeding him with a syringe, but we would have had to if he hadn’t started eating on his own, there’s a serious liver condition cats can get if they go too long without getting enough calories.

Which is not to say he’s out of the woods, we don’t know yet if he’s actually getting better or if the medicines are treating his symptoms but the underlying disease is still present. I’m hopeful that he is actually getting better and this may have been a stress reaction after Emma’s death. In less than two years the poor little fellow went from being the youngest of three cats to the oldest of two. He loved having his big sisters look out for him and took a great deal of comfort from them. He wasn’t nearly as close to Emma as he was his best friend Scout, but they were friends and grew up together (we adopted them on the same day), so perhaps it all just overwhelmed him one day.

We have a follow-up phone call with the vet today so we’ll see if she wants to try taking him off the medications.

It’s the first time we’ve had to give him pills and while I didn’t expect it to be easy, I was caught off guard by how much it freaked him out. Granted he’s had a difficult week but he bit me hard in my hand, twice, and eventually it took my wife and I to get pills down his throat, one holding him tightly wrapped up in a blanket or towel while the other worked the pill shooter. My wife picked up some Pill Pockets to try, little pockets of food you can put the pills in, and I was shocked that he ate them right away. I was surprised because none of our previous cats would touch them but as long as he’s eating, he went from being by far the hardest cat we’ve ever had to give medicine to, to the easiest.

It was hard to reconcile when I gave him his pill at midnight last night, that twenty-four hours earlier I was standing in that exact spot, bleeding and in pain, and Sam was as freaked out as I’ve ever seen him, and now he not only took his pill with no effort, but seemed thankful for the extra treat. They may not have worked with our other cats, but you’ll forgive me if at the moment those little pill pockets seem like humanity’s greatest invention.

I took this picture of him last summer, normally he likes to curl up on my wife or I but perhaps because of the heat in our non-airconditioned house he curled up beside me. This pose, one of my favorites of his, I call the bunny rabbit.

Not Bad News

Our cat Sam curls up on the love seat in my office with an array of water bottles behind him on Halloween in October 2014

After not eating or drinking much yesterday, Sam spent the day at the emergency vet getting an ultrasound and some medications. The news from the ultrasound isn’t so much good news as it isn’t bad news. There’s no blockage in his intestines so he won’t need a risky surgery, which we’re thankful for. Based on the amount of food in his stomach and intestines, given that he hadn’t eaten since the previous evening, they think the food may be moving too slowly through his digestive tract. We’re trying some medicines to see if they help, and although we haven’t seen any improvement yet, he’s still a little agitated from the day. We’ll see how he does tomorrow, we have an appointment with our regular vet in the afternoon.

They mentioned that the appetite stimulant they gave him can cause excitability, and given the howling and cage rattling I heard from the cat carrier behind my seat as I drove home, I thought for a moment I had our beloved Templeton back there. Sam reminds me of Templeton too when he steals my spot. If he’s been curled up in my lap and I get up, he can’t resist moving over to my thoughtfully pre-warmed seat. Unlike Templeton, though, he doesn’t try to trick me into giving him the spot, he only takes it when the opportunity presents itself.

Something Is Wrong with Sam

Our cat Sam looks at me as he sits in the window nook of the kitchen of our house on Halloween in Octobe 2014

While he devoured his breakfast like normal yesterday morning, last night Sam wouldn’t eat his dinner. After what we just went through with Emma and given how lethargic he was, we decided to take him to DoveLewis, an emergency vet here in Portland. They ran extensive blood work (which all looked fine) and x-rays (which weren’t alarming but also not conclusive), so I’ve stayed home with him today to monitor him. If he doesn’t improve he will spend the night at DoveLewis getting fluids and an ultrasound tomorrow.

Boo vs. Emma

I thought that when we adopted our dog Ellie in 2009 it would be our most difficult introduction, as our three cats were not used to dogs, but it turned out to be our easiest. Our toughest would be in July of 2013 when we adopted a shy little kitten we named Boo. When we met he was so terrified he literally shook so we took his introduction to the other pets even slower than normal, keeping him isolated for a couple of weeks, then slowly allowing him more and more time in the house at large.

With the slow introduction Boo gained confidence each day, which was fortunate, as we fell in love with the little black-and-white cat rather quickly. But one hurdle remained: Emma.

The Watcher

I spent most of that first month with Emma while my wife was with Boo, as Em was not happy with the arrival of the little fellow. Em had become my little buddy after Scout died early in the year and that bond helped when we started giving Boo short stints in the house at large. She’d follow him around everywhere he went, staring him down, and hissing if he got too close. You can see her in the background of the picture above, watching Boo from the base of the cat tree, while he plays with one of her beloved strings.

Boo vs. Emma

We’d let Boo out until you could see on his face that he was getting a little overwhelmed, and then we’d take him back into his secluded room where he felt safe and then Emma (and to a lesser extent Sam) could feel comfortable in their space too. A few days later and she was still staring him down, while he was mostly trying to avoid eye contact, but desperate too to fit in. When it was time for Boo to go back to his room, I’d shower Emma with as much attention as she could tolerate, and she relaxed a bit more each day.

Our cat Boo looks at me as he sleeps on our cat Emma, one of the first times she allowed the young kitten to do so

A few days after the above staredown Boo and Emma were sleeping on my couch when Boo came in and nestled in between them, and I was delighted to see Emma not get up. By the end of August, a few weeks after Boo was given full run of the house, I came into my office and saw Boo using Emma as a pillow. She had long let Sam do this but it was a first for the brave little Boo (I apologize for cutting off her foot at the edge of the frame, but I was shooting quickly while trying not to wake her).

Our cat Boo sleeps with his faced pressed into the stomach of our cat Emma as they sleep beside me on the love seat

But my favorite moment of their introduction was in October when Emma had been sleeping beside my legs as she so often did. Boo came in and at first just curled up beside her, then he got a little more bold and put his head on her. But I was startled when he suddenly put his arms around her and just buried his head in her stomach. This woke her up and I was sure she was going to get up and go into the other room, but instead she stretched her arms down his back and cradled him. He turned his head for a little air and she spooned him and they fell asleep together.

That was our Em.

A closer view as our cat Boo sleeps with his faced pressed into the stomach of our cat Emma as they sleep beside me on the love seat

Emma’s Third & Final Home

Our black cat Emma relaxes on the bed

We adopted Sam and Emma shortly before Christmas in 2007, two weeks after our cat Templeton died. We were her third home, her previous family had adopted her as a kitten but a year later felt they had too many cats and had been unable to find a home for her. I took this picture of Emma two days later on Christmas Eve after she joined Sam in quarantine in our guest bedroom. Initially we kept them in separate rooms until their health tests came back, but Emma was pretty miserable in isolation and it was a relief when she could join her new little brother and they could keep each other company while still being kept separate from our cat Scout.

With Templeton and Scout, my heart was open to loving a new cat before it was finished breaking for the departed one, and so it is with Emma. We went to the Oregon Humane Society this morning to look at some of the younger cats, as Boo could use a playmate. The young kittens got adopted right before we got there but we had a chance to meet a sweet young cat that we are considering, though we have some concerns she might be a bit too shy. An outgoing young cat came up for adoption after we were there that we will meet in the morning, but perhaps she will be too much for Boo (and especially Sam).

It’s so hard to know. After all Boo was a terrified little thing who shook like a leaf when we met him, yet you’d never know it now by watching the confident little fellow who is taking over the household, despite being the youngest by far.

There’s no rush. Whoever we adopt will come to a good home, we just hope it’s the right one.

A Game of Strings

Our black cat Emma sits beside a shoestring, waiting to play

One of my favorite pictures of Emma, taken last summer. We discovered early on that she loved playing with strings, when she was young if you sat on the ground and dragged an old shoelace around you, she’d circle you until she was exhausted. Later she’d learn to predict your actions and try and jump over you to cut the string off at the pass. Throughout her life you’d find her sitting by one of her shoelaces, not wanting to miss out on the chance at a game of string.

String got more complicated when we adopted Boo as he also loved to chase them but with the exuberance of a young cat, something Emma didn’t always appreciate. I’d sometimes play with both of them, a shoelace in one hand for Emma and a shoelace in the other for Boo. If two-handed string was an Olympic event the gold would have been ours. Eventually though Boo would want to play with whatever string his big sister was playing with, so it was fortunate they learned to play together.

In the picture Emma is sitting at the entrance to my office, at the end of her life this is where she chose to hang out most of the time (not in the doorway, though, just a bit over to the left). She didn’t have the energy to play string towards the end, a clear sign of how sick she was getting. Sometimes she’d chew on it if you laid it across her paws, especially a ribbon from one of the Christmas presents.

When I look at the picture I’m struck by how lovely she was and the beautiful life we lost. But I’m reminded too, of the beautiful life we shared.

Back to Work

A view from below of our black cat Emma sleeping at the top of the cat tree

I woke last Thursday to our cat Sam walking on my chest. I checked my watch and saw that it was nearly 6 a.m. and knew my wife would be feeding the pets momentarily. I must have immediately fallen back asleep because I woke minutes later to our dog Ellie climbing in beside me, having just finished her breakfast, which doesn’t take long. She waits for me to get up because every morning after I make my breakfast I give her a dental bone, which has become her favorite treat.

Everything seemed normal in those first few moments until I remembered Emma died the night before.

I expected a wave of grief to follow but instead I just felt numb. Unable to go back to sleep, I went down to the basement to scoop the litter boxes and realized I was only scooping for two cats now, but I still felt numb and although I had planned to take the day off from work, began to wonder if I was going to be OK to go in after all.

But then I went up to the main floor to make my breakfast and saw a pen on the counter and started crying. Emma’s medications got complicated enough that my wife made a calendar of what she was taking each morning and night, and we’d use the pen to cross off the medicines as we gave them to her, and towards the end also wrote down her weight and how much baby food she ate each day.

As I walked to the cupboard to get my breakfast and Ellie’s bone a wave of grief hit me. My wife gave Emma her pills at her first morning feeding, which stressed her out enough that she wasn’t always able to eat as much, but she was ready to try again by the time I got up. She’d mill about my feet as I made my breakfast and then I’d sit with her in the kitchen to encourage her to eat as much as she could. So much of our lives towards the end revolved around trying to get her to eat, and now her absence broke my heart.

I grabbed my laptop and sent an email to work to let them know I was taking the next couple of days off. I still hoped I might be able to go in on Friday but I knew as soon as I woke that morning that I wasn’t ready. Each day brought healing and by Saturday afternoon I was ready to take down Emma’s beloved Christmas tree. Sunday I went up to my favorite refuge for part of the day, unsure of how long I’d stay, but I had some nice moments and it brought comfort as it often has before.

I’ve been back to work all week and while it hasn’t been my most productive week, I’ve done OK. If I get too distracted by thoughts of Emma I take a walk around the track across from my office, and had to take an especially long walk today, but it’s getting better.

Looking back through my pictures of her has brought as many smiles as tears this past week and has helped push me down the healing path. I took this picture of her last summer, a day after we adopted Boo and the day my mirrorless camera arrived, and was just playing around with the new camera. She’s asleep on the top shelf of the cat tree, I was laying on the ground shooting up towards the ceiling.

It still hurts that she’s gone and will for a while yet, but I’m so thankful for each day we spent with her.